I never realized how my drinking affected those closest to me. I didn't realize how much it took away from my quality of life; how much I was missing. Over the last few months, the veil has been lifted, a little at a time.
F and I have been together for years now but until I stopped drinking, it didn't occur to me that we were never truly connected. We've been through a lot and managed to keep the relationship afloat but it didn't flourish. He hid online, I hid in my bottle. We kept secrets from each other, lied to ourselves and each other. We pretended that things were good. They were ok but now I know that it can be so much better, so much more and it is.
We're both enjoying the benefits of my sobriety. He gets all of me now, not just the shell of me. I'm not saying it's all sunshine and roses but it's a heck of a lot better than it ever was. I'd like to think he's happier with me than he has been at any other time. I know I'm happier with him. I love our life together.
Thanks for sticking with me through this process, F. I wouldn't be the same without you.
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